Raven's Urges
by psychos-xx-need-xx-love-xx-too
Summary: Raven is doing everything possible to fight back her urges for Starfire, but her Tamaranian friend's naivety is not helping FEMSLASH! and rape, and...well pretty much anything you can think of will eventually be in here. NO FLAMES!
1. It Just Keeps Getting Better and Better

It's a dead evening. The sun is barely showing a glimpse of light off in the distance of the harbor and only a thin, pale stream makes it through the half pulled curtain. Raven continues to stare at the breaking waves while Starfire comes into the room.

"Raven? Please, Raven. I only want to know what's bothering you."

Raven gets up from her solemn chair and walks to the window with her back facing Starfire.

"Star," she chokes up for a minute, "you couldn't possibly help me. I just want it all to go away."

She doesn't move an inch from where she's standing except for a single tear crashing down her pale cheek just like those mirrored waves down below.

_I wonder if I could jump from this window. Would Star be able to catch me before I hit the rocks? No. She wouldn't be expecting a thing. _

"Please, Raven. Come sit down here with me so I can learn what is plaguing you so. If I cannot help then at least I could comfort you in your grief,"

_She's moving closer_

"Please, sister."

_Sister! No, no. Don't call me that of all things! I'm either gonna break down, here in front of the only person who's ever cared of my well being, or I'm going to jump out of this window. But if she manages to catch me, I cannot take the risk of her calling me her demented sister. Aw hell._

"Star. I don't deserve to be called your sister. I don't even deserve to live here anymore after what I've done. If you must know what's happened, then fine, but you can't tell anyone what you've heard. Although you'll never want to see me once you know. And more importantly, you will never trust me again, as it should be."

"Oh, please be certain that I shall not say anything! Please tell me, I will always care about you Raven. …. As it is Raven you know I care for you much more than I ever could my own family, but after yesterday you ran off so quickly that I'm beginning to think that you do not wish to be around me. I am sorry if I have done something to lose your trust…."

Raven just stared wholly shocked into Starfire's face.

After a few awkward seconds, "Star, there is no way in hell that you could ever lose my trust. I'm just not able to think clearly right now. I did something very wrong…"

"Then please tell me what it is that bothers you?" Star blurted very relieved it was not she.

"Okay then…"

* * *

In Raven's room two days ago

"Oh God. Oh God!" _Stop! What the hell are you doing?_

A soft moan rumbles through her now coarse throat.

_I can't stop_ "Oh God…." _I want to but I can't_

A VERY loud and longing moan fluctuates in time with the rattling of a shadow-engulfed lamp.

The lamp shatters when Raven screams into the dark of her room, sweaty and exhausted."It feels way too good," she thought out loud and collapsed on the bed in heaving short breaths.

_It keeps getting better and better. But how can I even look at myself!_

She can't help but to let loose a disgruntled groan. "I can't keep this a secret for long. Someone IS going to hear…"

_What will I do then?_

Staring, mouth agape at the wall, the realization of a new piercing idea… no _urge_, now hitting her fully.

_HOW DID THAT THOUGHT EVEN GET IN MY HEAD!_

"No, I can't…..can I? NO!"

"Stop it Raven before your demonic side gets the best of you," Knowledge saying swiftly in her mind. _I could never do that to her. But she's so beautiful….NO, NO, NO! Stop it Raven! STOP IT NOW!_

A deep sigh escapes her open mouth. _What the hell am I going to do?_

_Knock! Knock! Kno-_

"Just a minute Star." In Raven's surprisingly still deadpan voice.

_Shit! Where's my clothes! SHIT!_

"Raven? I was wondering if you would like to partake in watching a….chick flick, as I believe friend Beast Boy calls them?"

_Shit, I can't find my robe… what the hell? SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! I BLEW UP MY UNDERWARE!_

"Come on in, Star," Her voice lagging only slightly.

The electronic swoosh cracking the dark silence like a whip. "Friend Raven, may I sit and talk with you before we begin the watching of the 'chick flick'," Star's voice obviously troubled.

Raven only nodded, now dressed in only her leotard, minus her underwear. Her eyes were also slightly dilated and her deep violet hair strewn into knots and tangles, although in the lack of light none of this could be seen by Starfire.

_I wonder what could be bothering her? Oh, no! Could she have heard me! God, I hope I wasn't that loud…_

The nervous Tamaranian floated into a cross-legged position next to Raven on her bed.

_Oh, Shit! I hope she can't smell anything, please let her be too distracted to notice!_

Right then a leather bound book began shaking in the room's corner, although left unnoticed by Starfire.

"Raven, I wish to know the meaning of this Symbol on the case to the disc of watching," pointing to the capitalized 'R' on the bottom right of the DVD box.

"That's an 'R' standing for 'Rated'. It means the movie has scenes in it that most parents wouldn't like their kids to watch." Mentally sighing at it having nothing to do with her earlier compromising position. Then seeing the still worried complexion on Starfire's face, "But that's not what's bothering you is it Star?"

"No, friend Raven, it is not. Raven, as things are different here with Earth customs, I have been…been pondering on the details of some Earth relationships."

"Some? Well what exactly about it is bothering you? Are you trying to date someone?" With that said the book in the corner once again began to shake, only much more violently.

"Raven, on my home planet, people are very accepting of diverse relationships no matter the age, race, or…gender." Exactly one millisecond before Starfire said her last word the book promptly blew up.

Starfire jumped at the explosion and was now floating tightly in her arms in the middle of Raven's room, only a little shocked. "Star, are you asking whether or not it's okay to date other girls on Earth?" Raven managed to stutter under her breath.

"Yes, Raven, I am uncertain of the ways of the dating here and do not wish to portray a…taboo, I believe it is called, in my lack of knowledge when confronted on such a topic on the case that it should arise in conversation. But as I can see that this subject has become uncomfortable for you I shall depart. I am sorry for troubling you so friend Raven."

"People are usually some-what accepting of homosexual relationships, ones with two women… or two men." Raven blurted, her heart skipping a beat with each word and double-time for adding in "or two men" in mere seconds before it became obvious of what was on her mind.

"I am, very relieved you are not as startled as I had thought. Thank you for explaining friend Raven. Are you still wishing to partake in the watching of the 'chick flick'?" Starfire spoke, obviously trying to change the subject but also fearing that Raven was not open to her suggestive ideals.

Sensing her unease, Raven took a second to read her thoughts…_"Dear Raven, I am afraid you will not be accepting to what I wish to ask you even more. I truly wonder what action you would take if you knew."_

A look of shock wiped over Raven's face while five lights and a plant imploded up in the hall way. Feeling a little more willing but still just as, if not more, confused and wanting to clear the fog, "Star, who is it that you want to ask out?"

Starfire was suddenly taken aback, not even expecting the question to summit. She stared blankly out at nothing but air and replied, "Someone… who is… very dear to me, and closer to me than anyone on this planet. I try to spend as much time with them as possible but if they knew the true feelings I hold…I'm afraid that they would no longer even accept our friendship, nonetheless to want it to be more. I am sorry for bearing you with my problems friend Raven, I shall be waiting for you in the watching of the movie?" Star casually changed the subject once more as she was beginning towards the door.

"Yes, Star. I'll be right down to watch the movie." Raven replied calmly, contrasting the overwhelming speed of her heartbeats.

* * *

Starfire was sitting quietly on the large couch as the millions of previews began, of course with Starfire thinking they were part of the movie. Raven jutted in the room and floated languidly next to Star's seat, letting herself levitate slightly from the cushion.

"Hey Star, movie started yet?"

"Yes Raven! It is most magnificent indeed!", Star managed to spit out in desperate hyperactivity and concentration.

Star, now entrapped in the "movie", began leaning forward, as if it would in some way make the pictures jump from the screen. Raven was simply waiting for the movie to begin with her eyes softly shut, then started, allowing for a chair to be flung in a dark mass, when Star laid her hand on Raven's knee, gripping the joint tighter with each passing second.

"Um, Star?" Raven croaked.

"Yes Raven?" "You need to calm down, you're about to break my knee cap."

Seeing she had been gripping Raven's knee, she immediately let go and started apologizing, now oblivious to the just opening movie.

"I am so sorry friend Raven," She screamed while nearly suffocating Raven by being millimeters from her face. Raven just sat in shock of the ever-faster movements of Starfire who was grabbing various antiseptics and napkins, from the counter across the room and back to Raven, each pass getting uncomfortably more closer to Raven.

"Star stop. I'm fine." By this time (only seconds after Raven had told Starfire she was holding her knee) Starfire was nose to nose with Raven, actually nose-to-nose, forehead-to-forehead, knee-to-knee, thigh-to-thigh, and conspicuously lips to lips, only barely not being a kiss.

"Please have my up-most apologies friend Raven, are you sure you are stable?" Star asked out of concern for (seconds) earlier and for now seeing as Raven had a clear layer of sweat on her face not to mention the couch they were on being 4 feet off the ground.

Raven instantly regained her composure, replaced the couch to it's before position, and managed to squirm an inch away from Starfire, who only got an inch closer after doing so.

"I'm absolutely fine Star," and thinking quickly, "but you're missing the movie."

"Are you positive Raven, you're still sweating?" Star innocently shot out.

Raven held Starfire out about a foot by her shoulders and stated calmly, "I'm positive and we're missing the movie."

Satisfied, Starfire returned to her seat next to Raven and began to get entrapped in the movie again. Raven sat back and sighed inwardly, and tried to regain her heart rate to normal.


	2. The Drama Continues

Things were calming down some. Raven was able to scoot about a half-foot away from Starfire and Starfire was too focused in on the movie to care.

Then, "Hey guys were back with the groceries!" yelled a happy Cyborg who just kicked open the door with several huge plastics bags in each hand, "meaning we will be eating bacon, eggs, sausage, butter, and grease for breakfast!"

A sulking Beast Boy soon followed him up, "Man, this is so not cool!" drumming in as an octopus trying not to touch anything inside the bags he was carrying 3 feet above his head.

Next came Robin, looking very exhausted, "Calm down Beast Boy, you get to pick what you want next week, remember?" while plopping himself down on the nearest seat to the door, "But seriously, how much more bickering do you think you two could have done? Just because the people with the online money pool really want to know," Robin managed to splay sarcastically, obviously beat from trying to stop World War III from starting up at Wal-Mart.

"Greetings Friends!" shrieked the thoughtful Tamaranian, quickly finding herself attached to the nearest person, unfortunately for Beast Boy. "AHHH! Star, you're making me touch dead animals!" squirming to be able to breath and not touch the meat within the thin plastic.

She let go but was soon backtracking to her seat so not to miss anything. "What's up with her," Cyborg asked Raven. "She found a girl movie and now she's so far gone that I'm almost surprised she even got up to meet you."

He raised his eyebrow, "Raven was surprised?" "Almost," she retorted icily.

Cyborg raises his hands in mock defense as Raven continues to glare at him.

"I'm going up-stairs to take a shower," Robin broke in, "see you all later," waving his hand as he headed towards the door.

"Gotcha, I'm going down to the garage. You two enjoy the movie," Cyborg tossed to Raven and Starfire.

"Seeya," Raven muttered while turning her attention to Star.

* * *

The movie was getting close to the climax and everything was really tensed, leaving Starfire to nearly bite her finger off. Raven couldn't help but stare. _God, she looks so beautiful. Sitting so serenely yet so spellbound. How I want to pull her into a deep, deep… umm, embrace…okay, come back to Earth Raven._

Raven was pulled out of her gaze when she heard Starfire gasp. She glances over to see what Starfire was so shocked and still intently watching. To her amazement, on the screen was a hott sex scene in progress, scrapping shots of naked body parts and faces flushed with moans of pleasure.

Raven blushed a strong crimson and quickly grabbed the remote to speed through that 'part'. Starfire was glaring at the screen, eyes wide in… well surprise for one.

Without turning her eyes, "Raven, what j-just happened?"

"Apparently that's why it was rated 'R', Star," Raven crisply replied.

Starfire, still flabbergasted (ha! I got to say flabbergasted!) gawked, "I've never seen anything so…_carnal_," carnal having a certain emphasis, "Does that act not hurt?" facing Raven after saying the last two words, apparently thinking she would have an answer.

Raven just stared at her for a few seconds, picking her words carefully, "It usually only hurts the first time, then it feels really good."

"Raven. Have you…." Not able to bring herself to say a name.

"Yes, Star," not at all ashamed. Starfire gave a small gasp. "I am a half-demon, and…I have done things that wouldn't be considered to be something good guys would do. When I let my emotions take control of me…I also give in and let them _suggest_ certain things for me to do."

"These things that they made you do, did you not feel remorse after doing so?" Starfire seeming very puzzled with a quizzical look on her face.

"They didn't make me do it, they gave me ideas and I went along," turning her head down to the floor, "I felt no more guilt than any other human after doing something they know they shouldn't have, but, after time, I've come to accept it," looking Starfire straight in the eye, "and now I regret nothing." Being said almost with an air of hostility Almost.

"I see."…"Raven?"

"Yes." Raven's eyes' glistening with a look of rejection. "I understand," pulling a hand to her friend's thigh, "Do you wish to continue on to something else?" Starfire asked, aware of her friend's unease and to show her sympathy towards the subject.

Raven nodded.

* * *

Star began floating to the middle of the room. Apparently trapped in deep thought… "I KNOW!"

She flew by Raven who was sitting on the couch and grabbed her arm as she was picking up speed.

"Ah! Star, where are we going?" once Raven had finished asking they had already flown up two flights of stairs and out a window.

"We're going to see Jinx!"

"JINX? Why are we…wait how do you now where she lives? What…Starfire?"

by now they had flown into the city, Raven still being dragged by her arm over the warehouses until there were passing over some apartment complexes.

"Here!" Starfire stopped as abruptly as she started nearly flinging Raven into a broken window of an old apartment complex that looked abandoned.

"Starfire what are we doing here?"

"I usually come here to play box of X's with Jinx on the day of the fries. She is very accommodating and I thought you would enjoy some time here to relax."

Starfire had just knocked on the door with her last syllable all the while smiling sweetly at Raven.

"Starfire! It's so good to see you!" Jinx jumped out of the doorway into a leaping hug on Starfire. "Yes friend Jinx it is indeed very joyous to see you as well. I brought friend Raven to visit!"

Jinx looked skeptically at Raven, eyeing her up and down. "Starfire are you sure…"

"Oh there is no need for worry. Raven is most reliable."

"Good enough for me," Jinx put her hand towards Raven, "You fight well, even scratched up my clothes in that last jail break. Mind showing me some of those moves some time? Oh! I almost forgot!"

Jinx ran inside and yelled back, "Come on in and makes yourselves at home."

Raven and Starfire walked inside and Starfire took a seat down on a purple coach as Raven just stood next to a counter top. As bad as it looked from the outside it was actually a pretty well kept house.

"Here," Jinx floated into the room from a door down one of two halls, "you left your necklace last time you were here."

"Oh, thank-you Jinx. I was up the last two nights looking for it," Starfire said as she flew in and gave Jinx a choking hug before taking back a silver chain necklace with a hex pendant.

"Isn't it beautiful, Raven? Jinx made it for me, it's supposed to keep away bad magic."

"Does it work," Raven asked dryly raising an eyebrow.

"Sure does, I made it myself and hexes are my specialty. If it doesn't work then someone's cut the line in the middle there. That's the one that holds the necklace together," Raven kept her cynical expression, "go ahead and see for yourself," Jinx tossed the necklace to Raven.

Raven tried to capture it with her powers but it wouldn't pick up on the necklace. Raven jumped to the side before it could touch her. "You're right, I'd keep that in hand Starfire, it's a good piece."

"Why thank-you Raven, I'm glad I could impress such a strong demoness as yourself," Jinx said while mock bowing. "Hey, any of you want a soda?"

"I'd be most grateful Jinx. Raven do you wish for a beverage of caffeine and sugar?"

"Sure, I'm a little thirsty anyway," _damn, that thing really works. It would have burned like hell if it touched me. …is Jinx the one Star was talking about?_

Raven breathed in sharply. Jinx stopped and flew straight toward Raven grabbing her arm and pulling up her sleeve. "Shit, that magic contact burned you," Jinx grabbed a sharp wood carving knife and cut a straight line down a purple and red figure eight looking apparition glowing on Ravens forearm. Raven just looked away at the opposite wall.

"There," Jinx said as she finished up and rapped up the incisions with a medical bandage, "It'll take a little while to heal because the magic will have intercepted your healing powers. Sorry about that."

"I've had worse happen. You're not bad at this though, but I could have done it myself when I got home."

"Sorry, I just thought it better to take care of it now."

"So everything is okay, Raven is not harmed? Are you okay Raven?"

"Yes Starfire I'm fine, like I said I've had worse purifying charms put on me."

Jinx raised her eyebrow at Raven for a second. "I guess that's to be expected, huh?"

"Jinx can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure Raven. Star help yourself to the TV, remotes where you left it."

Raven's lip twitched.

Jinx led the way to a room off in one of the halls, apparently a guest room with only a bed and a dresser. "What's up Raven?"

"What are you trying to do with Starfire? Who do you think you are to come here and take…" Raven stopped mid sentence, barely keeping her monotone façade.

"Raven I think you've misread something here. Starfire's my friend and I'm not playing her. Why would you care if I was after her anyway? Are you?"

"No, Starfire's like my sister. I'm looking out for her. That's ALL."

"She's open Ravy. Go for her. And lighten up a little, huh? After all, it's not like she doesn't want you."

"What?" Raven spun on her heel, shock wiping over her face.

"She like's you Ravy. She's told me so herself. I told her not to tell you because I thought you'd hurt her by rejecting her like everyone else on this planet. Raven, don't hurt her." Jinx was staring right at her with the consequences of such an act obvious.

"Jinx!" shortly followed by a spastic scream.

Raven twitched as the two hurried to see what had happened only to find the disheveled alien girl bent over the couch's arm with her feet in the air. Jinx started laughing convulsively as Starfire let out an exasperated sigh.

"I wish you would just inform me how this mechinised lever controls the place of sitting so I would not fly into the ground every time I touch it!" exclaimed Starfire.

Raven started to giggle mutedly realising that not only has this happened before but that Starfire's bewilderment of something as mundane as a reclining chair never ceases to make her smile inwardly. Jinx helped Starfire back up to the couch while Raven sat herself precariously close to the same spot.

_Why does Jinx being a friend of her's bother me so much? Can I really see her as that much of a threat?_

"Is everything alright, friend Raven?"

"I'm fine, Star."

After helping Starfire, Jinx had gone back to get the sodas from before and was presently placing them on a center table.

"Hope you don't mind generic," she said towards Raven, "as you can guess, I don't have much to live off of."

_Never crossed my mind with you being a two-bit theif and all...wow, that was harsh._

"I grew up on the streets, it makes no difference to me."

"You too, huh?"

"What is this 'streets' where the growing up act had taken place?"

"It's a phrase for not having a home," Raven answered.

"It adds personality," Jinx beamed with a quirky optimism.

Starfire still remained confused but decided to let the answer suffice. Raven snapped her soda tab off and took a quick drink while Starfire and Jinx begain talking about childhood games, Jinx stating that her favorite was hopscotch and Starfire's being something called cklarvesclo that involved what sounded like very sharp spearheads tied to the ends of a some animal's body.

"Raven, are you ready to go back? The boys will be having dinner soon," Starfire said as their conversation began to die down.

"Yea, Star. Let's go."

"Goodbye, friend Jinx. I shall see you on the day of the fries?"

"Of course! Oh, and don't forget to bring chips!"

Jinx stared at Raven while Starfire floated out the door. Raven mouthed toward after her, "I won't", and walked out with her.


End file.
